Nepal Travelog: beginnings

Sunday, 7 April 2013

I have been in Kathmandu for 2 whole days now and have achieved quite a lot in that short time. I've toured the city, got my TIMS permit and Annapurna entry cards, rented warmer clothes, booked a seat on a bus to the trailhead paid my room and stocked up with some high carb supplies for the first part of the trip. And so tomorrow starts a new chapter, or the Nepal adventure proper if you like, as I begin the Annapurna circuit.

But what I really want to put down here is just how difficult it is to shift gears from normal, work-a-day life to travelling mode. Maybe it is because I am at a watershed moment. One month ago I quit my job and since then, have been putting in 14 hour days and more writing articles for publication as part of an ambitious self-improvement exercise. And it has paid off: not only did I submit my articles, I also somehow found the time to secure summer work and enroll in a course for the autumn. But there have been casualties. Latterly, I could feel that I was losing it slightly, that old familiar feeling of being unable to switch off, like being addicted to solving problems and never quite happy unless you can find one to deal with. Not exactly a recipe for nirvana.

And so it goes with these days in Kathmandu. True I have had a lot to arrange, and I cannot really imagine signing up to a trekking party and being denied the opportunity to experience the Himalayas on my own terms. But with all this extra decision making and obligation it kind of feels like I have not yet arrived; or worse, that I have arrived but not in my own head.

All this was going through my mind the other night as I lay in bed, jet-lagged and unable to sleep, and it was then that I came up with a couple of strategies (note the language: strategies not solutions). 

1. Mindfulness. By which I mean, breaking the circle of living in your own head by any means you want. I used to meditate routinely, twice a day in my younger days. But these days it is enough for me to chant my mantra for a few minutes to break out of a vicious circle.

2. Others. Others are often a burden for us introverts. Sometimes they can drain our energy and prevent us from processing our experience to the extent that we would like. But only sometimes. We are all placed on a spectrum when it comes to the polar opposites that psychologists so love to play with. As much as they prevent us from processing when we need to, just as much do they force us out into the world when we are only navel-gazing.

3. Decisiveness. A difficult one for me. The other two I have down pat, but this one... The difficultly perhaps lies in this. Knowing what you want is one thing, but being prepared to shut the door and stop looking back when you make a decision is another. I just have one piece of advice on this one, mostly for myself. I saw this posted on an internet forum about hiking in Nepal:

Q. What is the best hike in Nepal?

A. The one you're doing.

For me, this simple answer speak volumes. It says: open your heart and suspend your judgement, of others and most importantly, of yourself.

Time out for travelling should be an opportunity to explore different selves as well as different others. Knowing what you like is presumably what you hate, and why you have come here in the first place. As such, you have to feel on your pulse the truth that learning new things about yourself can only happen if you let down your barriers and affirm what you see.